Need help. My son's in grammar got excluded


My phone rings today. It's the grammar school my son's in. They tell me he got into a fight. They then tell me they're gonna exclude him for one day. He normally a good kid but some kid got under his skin. Thing is my son said to they other kid. "What's your problem? You wanna fight? " They other kid points at my son's steel toe caps and says he don't wanna fight my son unless he changes shoes. ( What total BS cuz I would have done him in my socks)
My son changes into trainers then they have a rough and tumble. As 14 year olds do. My son's school phones me and says they're excluding the boy for a day. I need to go meet the headteacher in four days. Thing is now my idiot son told the head he asked to boy if he wants a fight. Then he tells the head he changed into trainers to fight the kid. My boy tells me he beat the kid up as well. How the hell do I defend this? It looks pre-empted as he had the time to change footwear and offer him out. I have told him to write an apology to the kid involved and the headteacher. I can pull at heartstrings as well but if there's anything else I can do to keep the kid in grammar school i. Would love to hear from you.


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Look at it on positive side your kid stuck up for him self, he changed his footwear as damage could've been Alot worser if the boy in question provoked your lad and your lad offered him a fight what's wrong in that I would've said fight after school but how many of us got excluded from school for fights a letter of apology that's just bullshite as if the boy in question said something to your lad to make him want to fight it should be other way round but atleast it was for 1 day I got excluded for 3 weeks for calling my teacher a lesbian but that's a different story for a different day lol


just take it on chin (no pun intended lol)

just sit down with your boy and tell him not to do it again. he will be the bigger man if he just walks away.

as u say get him to write a letter and say sorry.


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Newsflash here, All kids in secondary school have a few scraps every so often, We all did it in our day, I had too many to remember, I have 4 sons, all grown men now, but in their schooldays I told them I never would have a problem with them getting stuck in if they need to, and we were called up to the school a few times, mostly with our youngest son, he was a bit wild, going looking for trouble when he didnt need to, we always got it sorted out with the school in the end, but he did get a two week suspension once, when you do go to see his teacher , point out your sons good points , particularly the good things he has done and does in school, also tell him that deep down your son did not really want to have the fight with the other boy, but maybe he pushed him into it a bit, at the end of the day, hopefully the school will see it as one boys word against another so rather than seem to be taking sides, they will decide to draw a line under it and tell each lad not to let it happen again.


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Although it's not a complete rant, I think the rant room is a more appropriate place for this thread, possibly because I am about to turn it into a rant LMAO

The PC/Snowflake brigade have turned this world on its head, our friends kid was being bullied for two straight years in school, even though he was quite proficient in boxing. His coach had told him to use his skills wisely, so that's what the young lad thought he was doing by walking away from this harrassment.
Eventually, he lost his patience, and decked the other fella with two smacks, and then the other kid calls racism(85% of the friends lad are Nigerian) to the school.
Our guy got suspended for a fortnight, when quizzed, the school said they were doing nothing about the bullying charge.
Organisations here in Ireland are scared sh1tless to be judged as racist, so they let the foreign nationals away with far too much.

Now, rant over !!

OP, on your initial question, I think you had the right idea, except, I'd be wary of putting anything into writing, ask the school to set up a meeting where a verbal apology can be made.
The facts are, both lads wanted to fight, regardless of your young lad trying to even up the score by changing footwear.